Preparing to Set Sail

While we are waiting for the decision of the doctors, I wanted to share with you an excerpt from my journaling in anticipation of our lives changing soon. I pray God uses it to inspire someone else entering into the unknown...

"I can pray for our sails to be set a certain direction, and I do, but ultimately my spirit accepts this reality best when I acknowledge that whatever direction I am taken by the Wind, it is to be accomplished by getting through one wave at a time.

To further the sailing metaphor, there is a beautiful island waiting for our arrival one day. We will coast up the sand, step out of the boat into the sparkling blue waters, and walk hand-in-hand up to the warm, soft sand. We will take a deep breath - look back at the waters we tread all those years - and thank God for His grace and deliverance. While we acknowledge the major moments, we simply won’t be able to count all of the miracles, as they have been like the depths of the ocean - immeasurable."

*The art is from an artist named Shellie Mitchell I discovered on Etsy. I love her work, and I hope you do too.

In the Waiting...

Hello!

Chris and I hope you all had a blessed Christmas season. We read through an advent book on anticipating the arrival of our King. A miracle. We both read in amazement as they waited for their miracle, just as we wait for ours.

After the fistula plug was denied in November, the doctor gave us one more opportunity to try the fistula plug procedure. Chris went back on a medication that is supposed to give him the best chance to become a candidate. Although, the side effects of the medication are awful (nausea, severe cramping, etc.) I was told I would hear from the doctor by Jan. 10th. If he is still not approved for a fistula plug, it appears surgery will be the next best option in the early Spring.

I will keep you all posted, promise!

Chris was home for Christmas and the time with family has been so memorable. His grandparents came to visit this Fall, which was nice since we can't travel to them. The dogs love having their daddy home because he is a constant cuddle buddy for them. Chris and his pittie are attached at the hip. :)

Even with home health nurses, the wound care can be emotionally and physically draining for us.(For the new people reading, a hole in Chris' bowel empties stomach acid and the contents of his small bowel into a bag on his skin that is changed daily bc it's so painful). As you can imagine, we wait with anxious anticipation for the doctors next words!

Please pray that we would be hopeful and patient with the anticipation of God's promises in the next year. Thank you so much...

- Jamie Lynn

Hello friends,

Christopher and I wanted to let you all know that he went in for the fistula plug procedure on Thursday but unfortunately, due to the wound changing in the month since the original imaging, they had to abort the surgery and the radiology team does not recommend the plug for successful healing at this time.

We are going to see his surgeon next week, where we will process through what Chris' options (or rather lack of) are to complete his healing, and bind up the last leak in his bowel.

Chris is disappointed - who wouldn't be? We are looking forward to hearing more from the team at Emory. Of course, I will keep you all posted. God is still good.

Be well and love each other deeply.

- Jamie Lynn

"Home is Wherever I'm With You"

Dear Friends -

A blog post is long overdue. You all are so caring and your messages are encouraging to us. Are we really entering the Fall?! (well, at least calendar wise but not temperature wise). Man, it is HOT outside.

Christopher was sent home from Emory at the end of August for another stent of "bowel rest" at home. It's interesting that it's called rest, because with a small-bowel fistula and the pouch changes it can be quite busy and intimidating. He's on a new, cutting edge medication and we are already seeing signs of healing. Small, baby steps lead to big changes! He has had some good days, and of course we try our best to make memories for him where we are.

He will go back into the hospital at the end of September. There is a CHANCE that he will be eligible at that point for a non-surgical, non-invasive procedure. If he is not (it depends on what his bowel looks like), it will likely lead to additional surgery in the late Fall or early Winter. He still has just one bag left...but depending on how that scan looks, we come to a fork in the road once again. Please pray for the non-surgical path, it would be the most amazing miracle to not have to send him back to the OR, ever again.

I'll be back to update you all after we know more in October. Enjoy these "endless" days of summer...

With love and appreciation,
Jamie Lynn & Chris

*Image from Google

It has been slightly over three months, and Christopher is still in the hospital after his mid-May surgery. He still has one bag left.

It seems surreal that my husband has been home a combined total of about 6 weeks this year. Two and a half years later, the shooting seems like it's becoming a distant memory, but the medical trauma? The surgeries? The pain. The loneliness. The nights apart? It's all still so real...and as far as we are aware, there is no end in sight.

The doctors have tried many methods to heal the leak in his bowel that came after his most recent surgery. It just hasn't happened, yet. I include the word "yet" because we have to continue to believe it. We will continue to pray for it. They will continue their attempts to heal it.

Chris and I have recognized a "gift" recently that we wanted to share with those following this journey. It's not a gift that can be unwrapped, or tied up in a pretty bow. It's a gift formed in the furnace of affliction. This gift is the comfort of being present with each other, day by day. It's not always like this, there is medication and stress that interfere with our true personalities most of the time - but today, it's sweet. It's real. It's right now. If you're a caretaker, you know this feeling. It's the gleam in an Alzheimer patients eye when you see a glimpse of them inside the fog, or when a child with autism makes eye contact...it's exhilarating to connect with someone on that level when you haven't been able to for so long.

The depth of our relationship is magnificent, and we both gain comfort and strength from holding hands and looking forward together regardless of what the mystery of this medical trauma holds for us this Fall...

We ask for your continued prayers as Jesus navigates this boat in these unknown waters just a little longer.

With love,
Jamie Lynn Sparkman

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Today we had the victory of removing one more wound drainage pouch from Christopher's abdomen. This was such a big celebration for us because a month ago, there were six different holes on his abdomen where stool was coming out of the leak and into three separate bags. Chris was so happy today. I will never forget the look of HOPE on my soldier's face. May today remind us daily of God's graces, seen and unseen.

One bag left...

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It's been a little over a month since Christopher's last surgery at Emory. After the discovery of the leak in his lower small bowel, we both experienced stages of anger, confusion, hopelessness and despair. Our spiritual journey took a deep dive, both together and separately...and with the support of faith, family, and friends we can once again give thanks for the grace and joy in our lives. Regardless of how long this road is actually going to be, there is always grace. There is always joy.

Now, a month after the initial leak, we are watching a slow miracle unfold. The leak is beginning to close on its own. We both saw it...and for awhile, no one said a word because we are too scared to hope, too scared to let ourselves believe that this could heal. Slowly, our hope has been reawakened. The nurses and techs can't get out of Chris' room without him reading them a daily devotion and praising Jesus for his mercy in our lives.

What changed? Our white-knuckled, clenched fists came down and our hearts cry was to feel the love of Jesus near. For the first time in two years, our view of God was based on truth and not on circumstances.
We realized; when everything is looking great, He loves us. When Chris' bowel leaks, He STILL loves us. Together, Chris and I continue to embrace the mystery of our God and His good, good plan for our lives.

Chris still remains in the hospital where he is being treated medically with IV antibiotics, IV nutrition & hydration, woundcare, special medications that aid in the healing/sealing of the bowel leak, and more.

Thank you for the continued letters, prayers, and messages of encouragement. They all come at divine moments, and move us to tears.

- Jamie Lynn & Christopher



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